Fat Tony's Occasional Dictionary

Hi! Didya miss me? A dictionary fell on my foot and I had to wait till my pal Bertie Bookworm lightened the load a bit. While I was waiting I had a look at the dictionary, and it was full of useless words like 'diet' and 'politician.' So I decided to invent a few of my own. Here's today's word:
Speculation (n.) That awful moment thirty seconds after putting your glasses down when you can't remember where you've put them and you're too short-sighted to see them anywhere...